What would your life look like if you took the time to align your time, attention, money and energy on things that correlate to your innermost core values?
Herein lies the dilemma, however. If you do not know what your top 3 core values are – – you may be caught up in a whirlwind of busy frenzy instead of productive growth.
After you figure out your top 3 core values … now ask yourself (if you dare) – what are your top 3 big goals you want to focus on for the next 12 months? ONLY 3.
Sometimes the ‘What If’ game is more like analysis paralysis. You get so caught up in trying to figure out possible outcomes, negative scenarios, you end up doing absolutely nothing. Or you spin your wheels on things that don’t actually matter to you. What if I look like a fool? Well, what if you shock the world and shine like a star?
How about we focus on the good kind of ‘What If’ game … what if I could simply and streamline and actually make my dreams come true? What if I enjoyed my days instead of feeling drained from stress?
Still with me? Dig deeper. Ask yourself the following questions. Really think about them – but give yourself a deadline to have the answers. A deadline you agree to is a promise, so let’s set a time/date and keep our promises to ourselves. We deserve nothing less. If you can’t be honest with yourself, figure out why. Here we go.
Questions to answer by your self-appointed deadline: Answer them in the order that suits you best.
What are my top 3 core values?
What are my top 3 goals/priorities for the next 12 months? (Be specific)
Who am I?
Who am I not?
What do I value?
What do I want more of?
What brings me joy?
What holds me back?
What lies do I need to de-bunk?
Are there any myths, assumptions or half-truths I need to clarify and clear up?
What lies have I told myself?
If you really have trouble answering these questions, maybe seek the counsel of a trusted friend, mentor or partner. Primarily, however, this is about YOU – – and what YOU want … not what other people want for you or expect.
I double dog dare ya to take the time to figure this out. Feel free to share with me how it goes. Your answers are private, no need to share unless you just want to – – but definitely share that you participated in this exercise.
And just to be clear for the record – – YES I am doing this too.
As always, make champion choices, The Healthy Habit Lady
Happy May! If you read the whole thing to the end … drop an emoji in a comment that represents your favorite line. OR just tell me 😉 I’d like that too. Here ya go, my wishes for you for May !
May you give more than you receive.
May you hear more than you listen.
May you learn something cool this month.
May you exercise your ‘No’ voice.
May you seek beauty and pure joy.
May you marvel at something unique.
May you remember why you started.
May you rekindle that flame inside you.
May you reach higher than is comfortable.
May you find time to rest.
May you touch your own heart.
May you smile at a stranger.
May you surprise yourself.
May you apologize without excuses.
May you hold a vintage keepsake.
May you eat a delicious treat with a friend.
May you think more healthy thoughts.
May you laugh so hard you snort.
May you unlock a mystery that’s profound.
Written by me: Debra Sue Harris
As always, make champion choices, The Healthy Habit Lady
This fantastic lady has been my sister from another mister since I was about 18 years old ( I think ) … friends through thick and thin –quite literally. She has lived with me twice in two different states. She gave me a wooden cross decades ago that I still have and hangs on my wall present day. She once asked me if I could teach her how to be a social butterfly like me and I believe my response was something like why in the world would you want to be like anyone other than your own amazing self … that was about the best I had at my 20 ish years of wisdom stage!
Lisa loves to drink tea and lives her life fiercely without apology for her never-wavering Faith in God. She is consistent and diligent, and has overcome much. I admire the steadfast way she relentlessly pursues a relationship with her Lord and always makes decisions based on her core values. She has spent time on her knees in prayer for me, as I have done for her.
No, today is not her birthday nor is it any kind of anniversary or anything. She lives in Virginia (my home state) and I live in Texas. We are miles apart in geography but never more than a phone call or text away. The moral of the story? When people that are important to you in your life come into your mind, tell them. If anyone is painfully aware of how very short this Earthy life can be, it is me. Let us waste no time speaking what’s on our mind.
Side note: She is one of the very few folks who have ever seen me dance in a bar!
Love you Lisa – we need another girls road trip.
As always, make champion choices! The Healthy Habit Lady
Allow me some leeway in this imagery and metaphor. In life there are two groups of people. Some are simply surviving. Others, well they truly thrive. Now these two groups can be compared to crows and eagles. A crow hangs around with the majority of everyone else (the 99%). Crows sit together on the power lines waiting for some random animal to get killed on the road, so that they can eat. Sometimes it’s a skunk, cat, dog or a deer — but the crow does not get to decide what it will have for dinner. Mr. Crow has to eat whatever comes along.
Then there are the eagles (the 1%). Eagles are solitary. They stand alone. They are different. They are NOT like everyone else. They are unique and special. When they get hungry, they decide what they would like to eat and they search long and hard until they find exactly what they want. It’s not easy, but they are free to choose and they don’t quit or give up until they have succeeded.
An eagle will travel 50-100 miles to get exactly what he wants, whereas the crow will travel 1-2 miles to take what they can get. The crow eats whatever life gives him. The eagle eats whatever he wants and decides what life will bring him. Crows wait for opportunities to fall into their lap. Eagles create opportunities because they go looking for what they want and don’t stop until it has been acquired.
In this life, we get to decide – every ding dang day -will we be an Eagle? Or, will we hang with crows? Â It is not by what we say, declare, post or dream about … but rather what we actually DO, that determines our destiny. You are what you do; not what you say. Got a goal? Write it down. Create a plan. Make it happen. If you’re waiting for someone to hand you your winnings … just remember, it is actually yourself for whom you wait upon.
Carry on.
As always, make champion choices! The Healthy Habit Lady
Well I wouldn’t dare name the blog post Fifty Shades of Grey now would I?  People might talk, but then again — let them. Besides, that’s an entirely different conversation for another day.
It’s New Year’s Day today.  2023. What are you thinking about? Are the brain gears burning and churning of all that’ll you do this year, accomplish – abolish – etc.
Many folks think of fireworks, fun parties, fancy clothes or tuxedos and what not. Or maybe you’re thinking of the hangovers 🙂 Then there are those that think … Hurry up, eat all the junk food in the house.  Drink all the alcohol.  Get it out of your system. Party hard!  Because of course; starting on the magical New Year’s Day, on the ever elusive January 1st, that mystical day of transformation, you are going to eat perfect. You will work out like a Greek Goddess.  You will have perfect portion control and macro nutrient timing down to a Science. You will be the envy of all the gossiping gazelles from the sidelines waiting to start their diets after the New Year’s rush dies down. They’ll join the gyms when the enthusiastic short-timers clear away. They’ll start on Monday, after the next Monday, or that next Sunday, or on the first. OR – maybe they’ll start when they get paid, or when they’re not stressed, or when they feel better, or when they look better. Some swear to start when they have more money, when the junk food is gone or when the in-laws aren’t visiting. But what if you find yourself at the next New Year’s Eve party swearing off resolutions because they never work. Then you vow and promise to get rid of the pounds that crept up over the last decade of failed and false starts. But wait – there’s still Christmas cookies in the jar.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with starting something new, with a new year or a new week, or even a new day … but with that, you must start it with a new mindset.  Why are you doing this? Is it a lifestyle?  Or is this some silly tradition or gimmick or cool kids’ table sorority initiation type thing? Well hey, all the OTHER mamas are doing Keto, so I should too, right? Â
First of all; stop assigning emotional value to food.  There are not good foods vs bad foods.  Food is food.  It should be fuel for your body, period.  Some food will fuel you better than others.  Some food will make you feel like crap; well that’s a given. Try not to beat yourself up and turn that into this whole diatribe about how you’re a horrible person because you ate a bag of chips that gave you diarrhea and made you feel like poop – LITERALLY.  So, um, okay – chips are not good fuel. Move on.  Some people swear by broccoli.  Well, that doesn’t work for me.  I can’t eat broccoli.  If I eat broccoli, I get very ill. That is not good fuel for Deb.  That is very BAD fuel for Deb – but not in the world of fitness and clean eating per se. Everyone hails broccoli like it’s a God or something.  Not in my world.  Thus is my point. Eat for YOUR body, not your neighbor’s.  Eyes on your own plate people. Not everything is black and white. There are a thousand shades of grey to mitigate.
The rules are sketchy and murky and ever-changing.  Why?  Because the only rules that matter are the rules that apply to you and your body, your health and lifestyle. Of course there are general ones that apply to most; like everybody should be drinking water! Meanwhile, guess what … your body will change.  Yup.  It changes all the dang time.  As I’ve become smaller; my rules have changed. Oh my word, Menopause changed the game big time.  I can’t do the same thing or eat the same way, I have to adapt. If your body changes, the rules change. And everybody’s physical tent is constantly changing and aging. My workouts have to change.  I’ve got to pay attention.  That is why I can’t just jump on every silly band wagon hippy fad magazine hype that hits the airwaves as if they’re the magic ticket. Â
Also … mental health plays a huge factor. Stress and anxiety, or insomnia, create havoc in our bodies and work against our best efforts. For me, grief has been a bombshell I was never expecting. The death of my daughter in 2021 affected me in ways I never thought possible. Between surviving a pandemic, surviving the death of a child, mitigating menopause and now battling anemia… I basically have to start over. Back to basics. I know what to do. I know how. I’ve relentlessly studied the human body, physiology and nutrition. But like my mama used to say about the Bible – – knowing the ten commandments and obeying them are two entirely different things. So yes, I know what to do. I just have to be consistent in doing such. Notice I said ‘consistent’ – NOT ‘Perfect’! Perfection is an illusion. Don’t fall for that trap. Hang out with me and you’ll see me start, fail, fall down, get up, crawl, climb, walk, jump, inhale fresh air, pray, sing, dance, stumble and stretch. Then rinse and repeat.
People come to me for advice all of the time.  That’s always welcome. I’m excited to do it; but all I’m really going to do is ask you a laundry list of questions to get to the heart of YOU.  One of two things happen:  The person gets excited and answers the questions, self reflect – and takes action – – or they disappear.  That’s fine, that means they were either ready or they were not.  No worries, I’m not going anywhere.  For those who are eager and want to join me in my ongoing journey… I’m still here. In the meantime; I’ll be in my corner of the world learning to walk and breathe again.
New Year’s Eve 1999 vs. New Year’s Eve 2014
New Year’s Eve 1999
New Year’s Eve 2014
As always, make champion choices, The Healthy Habit Lady
The Healthy Habit Lady 